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17th July 2009 {Friday, July 17, 2009 , 11:16 PM} today i went to causeway point. meet up with gina jie and serene dear to watch: Harry Potter And The Half-blood Prince [by the way, thanks jun jie] - for helpin me to buy the tickets online. and booked such good seats. i really appreciate ur effort =) wow! compared to the previous one i have watched, it was far better. hor my dear serene? =D haha. so happy that i can watch with u again, and give you the book personally. hope u will like it. after readin the words in the book, do u feel kind of familiar? cos i quote those words and display them on my blog. gina had an enjoyable day also. she told me. yeah =D u two are the best! thanks alot. every time meet up with you two, i feel alot better. erm... while i was watchin the movie... i actually thinkin that if only the time could stop right at that moment. that will be very very good. i do not know why either. but i felt so protected and secured sittin in between u and gina. got the feeling that with ur around, i will not be hurt again. but the time never stop, movie continued, your have to go and i still need to walk on the path that i have chosen. which i supposed it was another wrong decision that i have made in life. sad ='( [sob sob] hais. i still do not have the courage to walk on. although serene dear and gina jie always support me. and guide me through, but when i'm in sch, i will be lost. i think i was jus too dependent on your. but i knew that only my family and you two are always by my side when i'm down. never abandon me. others were like... err... i'm afraid of my future, afraid of the people i'm goin to meet. i jus wan to leave school. people around me are freakin fake. and acted as if like so close. mayb i was jus the same like them, no difference. that's why i choose to leave. do i have a choice? i have been askin myself this question for several times. why do people love mask so much? i do not love it, but i still need to wear it. i hate hate hate that idiotic stupid and irritatin mask. but can i really throw it away? everyone is the same, no one is ever real. [exception of serene, gina and saodah] althou it was very tiring to put on a mask to face people around me... it was also difficult for me to reveal my real self after so many years of hiding. unless i can leave the sorrows someday, the mask would never be taken away. |
